Exhausted Mums Struggling to Stay Focused
Updated: Nov 6, 2020
Struggling to Stay Focused
I hear this a lot from clients and mums I speak to and most often than not it is in reference to staying focused and present with their children, above anything else.
But don’t get me wrong, how you do one thing is how you do everything so if you are struggling to stay focused with your children you can bet there are areas of professional life being affected.
If you had to really examine and be honest, you would almost certainly find you aren’t producing focused work in your career.
You probably aren’t as focused on your relationship as you could be.
You aren’t giving your future enough focus.
And, you almost certainly are not focused on yourself enough.
And I'll tell you why for the latter, because if you were as focused on yourself as you needed to be and yes that might mean being what you consider to be selfish, it would allow you to focus more wholeheartedly on everything else in the measure you truly desire.
What Keeps Most Mums Stuck
The inability to self-evaluate and really dig deep is what keeps most mums stuck and in struggling mode.
And it isn’t their fault.
I have said this before and I will repeat it, we do not get taught these things in school or by our parents in most cases and so we grow up, have families and have to figure it out.
The sad fact is most mums do not figure it out and their children go on to have children and then the cycle continues.
And this is why I really wanted to create this blog because I believe the shifting of beliefs and what we have been taught and not been taught is a critical thing to evaluate.
Especially in times like this when there is a crisis happening in society which is leading to a crisis inside the homes of many families, on top of pre existing struggles.
Old constructs just do not work.
Divorce rates have shot through the roof and not necessarily because people needed to divorce but because being at home all day long with a spouse has magnified problems that were already present but got brought into focus and two people made a decision to walk away from each other, instead of walking away from the problem.
This happens as a result of struggling to stay focused.
Now I am not saying that all couples need to stay together, not at all, but what I am leading to is that focus or a lack there of in the right places will cause a myriad of consequences in peoples lives that are much bigger than are often realised on a day to day basis.
So before we get more into it, I was just wondering if you resonate with any of the below:
Do you find yourself struggling with consistent focus, what about retaining your energy, to get ahead everyday?
What about being present and influential in life, at work and with your kids?
Do you need more advanced tools and strategies for becoming more confident, productive, influential and energetic?
If the answer was yes, have a little think about this… What is the number #1 thing every mum in the world desires?
I personally believe that the answer, quite simply is: more, most mums if you ask them would say ‘a bit more..’ most likely! But in actual fact on the inside they are screaming for so much more but they do not allow themselves to access it or give themselves permission to allow it.
But in reality mums are struggling to stay focused because...
They desire more life balance and a lot more time, they desire more success in their business or career, they desire more passion in their relationships, they desire more money, more energy, more productivity and a bit more meaning.
Let’s be honest everyone wants more of the good things that life has to offer, right?
Well, to get more, mum’s need to activate their full potential, which we are all capable of doing.
They need to hit a higher gear and become high performers at whatever they do, which usually mums do not resonate with. However in order to become more focused, productive, influential and fulfilled that is exactly what they need.
And it is not as esoteric as it sounds!
So you might be wondering why would I need to be a high performer as a mother and what has it got to do with focus?
Well before we dive in let me show you what one of my clients Alex had to say:
"Ri's supportive, energizing and insightful coaching has changed my life in so many profound ways. I achieved more in 12 weeks with Ri than the whole year before! I never thought that the term high-performance applied to me before; I thought it was only for high-level athletes and professionals... I couldn't see how high-performance could or should work in my life. Ri showed me the very personal and highly individualized side of high-performance that was in alignment with my individual strengths, priorities and goals. She helped me to understand that it is one thing to say that I want to show up as my best every day and it is another thing to commit to harnessing my energy and my actions to actually be my best self every day. I went from being unorganized, unfocused and unsatisfied to having laser sharp focus, being fiercely intentional and to finally having that effortless presence and patience I crave for my family and business. I know that these mindset shifts will allow me to continually shoot for and always reach my next level."
You can also achieve this, so keep reading for free tools below...
How to Help a Struggling Mother
I spend my days helping committed but struggling mums to kick start their journey into becoming the women they want to be, building the career or business they really want and living lives they love.
I uncover the 6 High Performance secrets discovered in the largest High Performance study with over 300,000 participants in over 190 countries and help them to identify and break through their own barriers so they can reach their highest potential and performance in all they do. If you are a mum, I know you’ll love it as all my clients do.
But what I have learnt having worked with so many mums, is that if you aren’t practicing these secrets, you aren’t getting ahead the way you could.
But they are just not common and certainly not what we are being told for our well-being after having a baby.
The focus is much more on whether you are breastfeeding or not, is the baby latching correctly or not, is his/hers sleeping position correct or not, is the baby being held in the right manner for winding and burping or not!!
Suffice to say it leaves little room for a mother’s well-being to be at the top of the list and that is just a minute handful of the things mothers have to prioritise that take up a surprising amount of mental and emotional energy.
Struggling to Cope as a Mum; You Birthed a Child You Can Absolutely Re-Birth You and Your Life
And it is critical. Yes it may sound crazy after just having a new born but I can assure you it is vital!
Remember how when you birthed your children and all the prep you did before hand to welcome them into the world. Remember the hours of laborious contractions and then the gutsy, all-in push so you could see the wonderful fruit of that labour?
You displayed one of the most powerful strengths, will, resilience and courage, so you already know inside of you lies the strength to achieve anything you want you just need the right tools to get to that next level. I want to guide you in the right direction to get there. All you have to do to start becoming the woman you desire to be starts with a focus on what you truly want from life without the limits, without you holding back, how you want to feel, what you want to be doing, what you want to be enjoying, what is the ideal and what is standing in your way?
But in order to do that if you are still reading then you need some help to get there first and just like you wouldnt plant new flowers on top of weeds you would pick those out first, well we need to get rid of the exhaustion running your life and hindering you from see the cloud through the fog.
So below is my Masterclass just for mums like you to learn the 5 Key Shifts necessary for any mum really struggling on all the things we have spoken about today and much more. I lay it out for you step by step what you have to do and the amazing results mums who are doing it are getting:
So go ahead and click the link above so we can get started!
During this Masterclass you will discover:
A step by step game plan to stop you chasing your tail daily and understand what you really want from life and how to get it quickly.
The real reason why traditional coping methods for motherhood are not great strategies for your sanity and well-being and how you can transform the daily struggle and the course of your future and dreams starting from TODAY.
The secret to laser focus in all of your life arenas which will have you inspiring and influencing all members of your family and becoming a much more powerful role model for those you love and serve.
Why If you are unfocused and unhappy with your day job it can be detrimental for your family not just you and what you can do about it instantly.
How my clients are accelerating their focus, presence, patience, careers and businesses for ultimately fulfilling lives they now love.
I promise you, if you’ll show up with an open mind and desire to quit the struggle with focus you’ll see new possibilities you’ve never seen before.
I look forward to seeing you there, the information is like no other and a complete game changer but in the meantime a few tiny keys from me to brighten your day:
How a Mum Can Feel Better
With a 100% success rate in taking mums from frazzled, energy zapped to focused and crushing their goals at mamouth speed, I feel pretty confident saying that igniting your focus, energy and balancing family life whilst you reach your full potential full of purpose and passion is 100% NOT HARD. IT can be achieved with a few steps:
Put YOU first, it is not selfish it is in fact self-less. Keep reminding yourself of this.
Stop doing things that drain you.
Figure out who you are without the title of mum or wife.
Dedicate yourself to your growth now and make it a lifelong commitment.
Sell yourself on your dreams. There is a reason you have them.
Don't over complicate your life. Keep it simple, however that looks.
Choose to embody joy, peace and feeling so good.
Believe you're worthy of everything that you truly want. Repeat 'I am enough' however many times daily necessary until you believe it and feel it.
Trust yourself everyday even when you make mistakes or don't get your whole to do list complete.
And the BONUS...
"Have faith, mine is in GOD and it is the biggest life changing strategy if there ever was one."
Mums, although it may not be easy trust me when I say… It can be simple and you do not have to go it alone and without the key strategies to help you/
I fully know that being a working mother is hard, I have four children but I also know that when I am intentional and invest in myself in the above ways my life flows.
And I want you to know the same can be true for you, to make it that bit more easy don’t miss out on the Masterclass, it will really fall into place.
Ri Justin CHPC is a Certified High Performance Coach and the Founder of Mums Ri-Wired. She is known as the ‘secret weapon’ for mums and takes professional and business mums from overwhelmed and frazzled to balanced, focus and thriving with her signature coaching program.