The Broken Thing Causing Overwhelm in Your Life and What to do About it...
Updated: Jul 13, 2021
YOU DON'T HAVE AN OVERWHELM PROBLEM AND YOU MAY NOT WANT TO HEAR THIS
...but your issue is, you have a broken plan!
So what is this word overwhelm that has become synonymous with motherhood?
For mothers it is that strong feeling of being buried or drowning under the myriad of responsibilities and to do’s within any one given day, which most of the time are completely unrealistic.
I want to share with you a little graphic I put together to show just how crazy the life of a mother can look, and quite simply the epitome of overwhelm on a single woman trying to run a household...
A Mother's Mental Overwhelm
So right now you are probably trying to fill all the areas depicted above of your life successfully; You, your work, home, health, family, friends, social, spiritual, financial, but it probably feels how this diagram looks - A funnel pouring way too much in at one time! There’s quite simply one of you and a gazillion items, remember, ponder, store, action for the future etc. and this is contributing to an energy zapping experience every single day and literally draining your capacity to enjoy a more vibrant pro-actively led week.
To top it off, as well as all the things you mentally have to contend with and try to organise, you are also physically trying to get through each day, but in what I call ‘The Theme Park Life’... Look familiar ladies…
The Theme Park Life
The theme park life has mums running from home to work, to school runs, pick up, school clubs, meals, homework, house duties, doctors, events, meetings and so much more and on top of that you want to add another 5 or 6 things from the fanciful hope category and hope they are a success)
The reality is there is a simple way to completely get rid of this frantic lifestyle. No mother thrives on this nightmare of running all over the place on limited time, adding more and more to the mix, meanwhile the kids want more from you and your husband wants more.
Today I find myself constantly working through successful life and daily plans with my clients, to which they all reply:
'ohhh I never realised how much I needed this, how was I actually living before?' Because they were once all living in the Theme Park Life. The only problem with it in our lives is that it isn’t at all fun!
Not to mention, society has us convinced that all we need is more time and our lives will magically be perfect simply overnight; saying good riddance to overwhelm.
More time for tasks!
More time for family!
More time for that business!
More time for me!
Yet no amount of extra time can fix a broken plan, or worse yet a lack of one.
Time is a resource a little bit like money, more money will not ensure you handle your finances better. It just means there will be more for you to spend, there is no guarantee that your stewardship abilities are going to skyrocket because the zero’s in your bank account do. Just take a look at all the lottery winners, statistics have shown as many as 70% go bankrupt within 3- 5 years!! Yes you read that right. So what does that tell you??
Quite simply more is not the answer. You may be able to take a poor person from poverty but you can not eradicate a poverty mindset just by giving said person a ton of money.
Time works in exactly the same way. People who are time poor are not physically time poor, it is a mindset they have around time that contributes to a feeling of never having enough of it.
At the end of the day we all have the same 24 hours in a day so why do some mums get a myriad done and feel uber accomplished at the end of each day whilst others can barely cross off to do list and feel shattered at the end of each?
The Answer to Overwhelm
...is fixing a broken plan. Broken plans stem from a skewed mindset around the concept of time. The same way someone who is broke has a skewed concept around money.
Check out this post I wrote if you want to find out the 5 Shifts you can make instantly to correct a mindset that is not serving you.
Here are a few things that tell me if you have a planning problem and not a time/overwhelm problem:
You do not have a schedule that aligns with your highest priorities and end goals so (you are still running around reacting to your day).
You are suffering with insufficient mental, physical and emotional energy.
You are living in a withering marriage or relationship.
You have low congruence with the woman you want to become (you make decisions and choices according to your current daily reality).
You are not ready to scale y